New (slightly bigger) duds for Clare

"To combat the decline in wearable pants, Ross and I went shopping at some maternity clothing stores. I am not an avid shopper and trying to find clothes that will last through five or more months and 20-35 pounds of belly and hips is a little daunting for me. However, we did manage to find a very cute, and on sale, pair of black (I actually thought they were navy until we got them home, but I still like them) slacks from Gap Maternity.

Besides the finding clothes to fit an expanding body aspect of it all, maternity shopping is pretty neat. All the mannequins have cute mommy-to-be outfits on, that I could conceivably look good in. They're not like the mannequins at Banana Republic or J Crew that don't have natural curves and where I can't even get my hips through the waists of the jeans or dresses -- not to mention my short torso that brings said waists of jeans or dresses three inches from my neck. Ha! Even though they're maternity wear, I feel pretty cute in these new slacks.

Maternity shops also have some of the nicest dressing rooms around. There are little play stations (the kind with blocks, not video games) for the kiddies, light and airy pastel colors and A LOT of room to move around in. Plus, each dressing room has this nifty cushion-like item on a belt hanging there waiting for you. It is a prosthetic belly. It's a riot, but also slightly frightening once you catch sight of yourself in the mirror, clothed and full bellied. I totally scared the poop out of Ross when I stepped out of the dressing room three months MORE pregnant than when I had stepped in."
--Clare, 8/22/05

Oops

"My prenatal appointment wasn't as thrilling as I had anticipated. I was about four weeks early in my assessment of what supposed to be happening, because:

1) I only gained ONE pound (I'm hoping for the sake of Bucky that that pound is all baby and baby-room-and-board necessities), and

2) I have to schedule the second ultrasound (duh--says so in all the books but did I pay attention?).

I have since scheduled the ultrasound to coincide with my five month appointment in mid-September. By that time I will be at the 20 week mark, HALFWAY! Then I think I'll just view the weeks like the launch of a shuttle: T minus 20 weeks, and counting!!!

Anyhoo, just read the "Time for a check-up" entry again around September 15th..."
--Clare, 8/22/05

Another pregnancy dream

"I had another dream, though I don't even remember this one.

Last night I woke up to Ross poking me, saying 'Honey, you need to roll onto your side.'

'What? I'm on my side,' I replied, still sleeping (and meaning my side of the bed).

'No, honey. You're on your back. You need to sleep on your side.'

'Oh, thank you.' I mumbled, and rolled over and fell back asleep.

When I mentioned this funny incident to him the next morning, Ross told me that I had actually woken him up first by talking in my sleep. He mimicked me by laying on his back, right arm extended half way, with hand flopped over and saying, 'Oh, no. ALL my children do that!' in a breathy voice.

I'm not sure what they all did or how many there were, but I guess even in my dreams I'm starting to adopt the motherly tendency of defending my children.
--Clare, 8/15/05

Why "Bucky" ??

"Many of you have wondered how Ross and I came up with 'Bucky' as the temporary name for our baby.

Right after we learned I was pregnant, Ross went on a trip to visit his friend in Chicago and Milwaukee (they went to both locations). This friend of ours is a huge University of Wisconsin fan. Every weekend of College football season he calls us bright and early to ask, 'Are you ready for Badger Mania?!' We haven't ever told him that we, just Ross really, only follow the Huskies and the Irish.

During this trip, our friend told Ross he had to get me some gear from the U of W (the need for the gear wasn't related to Bucky -- he didn't even know I was pregnant -- he just felt that I really needed some badger gear). So, off to the store they went and bought a red long sleeved t-shirt with 'BUCKY' in white block letters across the chest. 'Bucky' turns out to be the name of the badger we hear so much about -- did you happen to know that badgers can run as fast backwards as they run forwards?

Back home, when I opened my gift and held it to my chest, Ross and I just started giggling because it seemed to both of us as though I was wearing a giant name badge -- a name badge for our baby.

It's not that exciting of a story, but we thought it was pretty funny at the time. It's been baby Bucky ever since.
--Clare, 8/5/05

More grandparents-to-be get the big news

Clare and Ross also want to share the story of telling the Swanes grandparents-to-be about the pregnancy. Apologies for the delay in getting this blog on the site! It's tough to keep up with all the great blog material Clare sends. Anyway, here's how Clare described it:

"We were trying to wait until we saw Ross' parents, Pam and John, in person to tell them about Bucky. We had a trip planned to Gig Harbor (Ross' hometown) to celebrate his grandmother's eightieth birthday and we had planned to tell them then. However, it kept getting harder and harder to answer their repeated 'Anything new going on?' with a dull voice and stories of day-to-day minutia.

By the time the Forth of July arrived (Independence Day is a very important Swanes holiday: not only would the family would celebrate their patriotism by setting a boat ablaze with fireworks, but it had also been Grandpa Swanes' birthday), we decided that we couldn't wait any longer. Plus, what better day to share the news?

Ross made the call:

'Hey, Mom. Clare and I have been looking over the calendar, and well, we might have trouble making it out for the holidays and Emily's graduation, because, well... you're going to be grandparents soon after that!'

As with any good surprise, the appropriate response came immediately:
'EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!' We heard the sound of pure, spontaneous joy escaping Pam's heart in the form of a high pitched, spirit-lifting squeal. We had caught her completely off guard.

Then Pam told John to get on the phone. He protested that he couldn't as his hands were covered in raw shrimp. A small 'discussion' between Pam and John followed, concluding with hands getting washed. Soon Ross heard his dad's voice, 'Yaa-ello?' (the typical male Swanes phone greeting).

Since the cat was already out of the bag, and I'm sure Pam's glowing face gave away the exciting news, Ross simply told him, 'You're going to be a Grandpa!'

John's reaction made us chuckle, 'Wow! Gosh, this is exciting! Oh, wow! Oh, my!' My personal favorite was, 'Gee wiz!'

Pam and John were, and are, completely excited. It was a great weight off our shoulders to be able to share the news with them, and it was so much fun hear how excited they are about becoming grandparents."

Time for a check-up

Clare has scheduled her next prenatal doctor's appointment for August 19. She's excited about the check-in for a couple of reasons:

"One of the things I'm really looking forward to at this appointment is the weigh-in. I know it's more like torture for women at a routine physical, but in this case it's a good thing. With my belly expanding so much, I can't wait to see the results. The first few times I've had to weigh-in, I've felt like a bad mother because my weight didn't increase. I'm hoping for a gain of five to ten pounds. From there, it'll keep going up up up -- but hopefully not too far because I don't know if I can deliver an 11 pound baby!

The other thing I'm expecting at this appointment is our second ultrasound. I have mixed feelings about it. Though I want to see how Bucky has grown, I don't want to accidentally find out if Bucky is really a Buck or a Buckette! Ross and I are at odds on this issue, each trying to convince the other. He wants to know the sex in advance and I want to wait until the birth. It's just such a fun secret, not knowing and dreaming about the possibilities. I think I might actually have a hard time if we do find out early. That's just me,though. I'm a little funny like that."
--Clare, 8/5/05

Bucky belly

"It's happened.

At 15 1/2 weeks, or 108 days, into this pregnancy I can't find anything to wear. Now, most of this is because the clothes that still fit me were held captive by the washing machine this morning. I assumed that it wasn't a problem -- and you know what they say about assuming! I definitely assumed wrong. I tried on skirt after skirt, pant after pant. None would button, snap, zip or buckle over this new belly of mine. I don't know if this is the popping I've heard so much about, but my belly is growing for sure!"
--Clare, 8/11/05

Where was I, again?

If you've talked to Clare recently, or if you correspond with her via email, you may have noticed slight changes in her communication style. I must admit I have. However, as long as Clare doesn't start doing anything like this, I think we can humor any amount of absentmindedness.

Here are some of Clare's observations of the impacts of pregnancy on the mind:

"Now I don't claim to be the best speller, nor do I always have an unquestionably solid memory of events (even though I like to think I remember things exactly as they happened), but the pregnancy seems to have made both of these abilities worse.

It's not my ability to spell that is suffering, but the hand-eye coordination that is necessary for proper typing. Thus, my words generally end up with mising, aadded, or just completely weronf letters in the mix. I've examined them closely and my fingers are definitely not fatter and there is no water weight gain going on. I can only conclude that it is all the coordination (and possibly my unique approach to spelling) that is at fault. However, it takes me twice as long to type a single sentence as it does to tie my shoes. Apparently the hand-eye coordination necessary for shoe-tying has not been hindered by pregnancy.

As far as my memory is concerned: If I'm in the middle of a story, or even a sentence, please don't interrupt me. I will not know where to pick the conversation back up again, or even what it was about. If asked a question about yesterday, or possibly even earlier in the day, I cannot guarantee that I can answer, let alone figure out what you are asking. I'm a little flighty, a little distracted, and still very tired. Where is all that energy I'm supposed to get with the second trimester?"
--Clare, 8/8/05

The first of many dreams to come

"This past weekend I had my first baby delivery dream. I guess it's because a close friend of mine is going to deliver a baby boy any day now, and we were talking all about what delivery might be like on Friday.

In the dream I'm alone in my old bed at my mom's house. Ross, for some reason is sleeping in the living room downstairs.

The baby is half-way out, and there is no pain (total dream), I just push and push on my own.

I realize I'm going to need some help soon, so I call for my mom, 'MOOOOOOMMMMMMM!' just like when I needed a glass of water when I was a kid.

She arrives, smoking (which my mother has never done -- seriously).

Out comes the baby -- silent. Mom runs to the bathroom to get a towel to clean up both of us (it's a bit messy, even in this painless dream) and I jostle the baby a little to make sure it's alive.

She (it's a girl) starts to cry, mouth wide open, and full of these metal post-like things for where her teeth are going to be. They're all crooked and spaced badly. Those who really know me, know that teeth are a HUGE thing for me. This is when you might say my dream turns to a nightmare.

I get a little worked up over the metal posts, but gaze lovingly at my little girl. She then takes my mothers cigarette and starts to smoke. This is too much for me and I wake up with a start, a little panicked, but relieved it was only a dream."
--Clare, 8/8/05

Anyone can comment

I've just altered the settings for The Bucky Blog, so now any reader can comment on a post. My apologies if you were having difficulties commenting previously. Please let us know what you think, if you would like to see certain topics discussed, or if you have questions for Clare, Ross, and Bucky.

Now entering trimester two

"I am now officially in the second trimester! Unfortunately, I did not pop out of bed this morning and I do not seem to have more energy. I'm still patiently waiting. If I believe hard enough it'll happen, right?

I think part of the problem is that I'm having a hard time sleeping. Yeah, and I'm only beginning my fourth month and not even bulging yet. It's difficult for me to not be able to fall asleep on my stomach (as that's how I've been drifting off to dreamland for the last 20-some-odd years -- I'm learning I probably didn't sleep on my tummy the first year or two of my life, because it's not healthy for babies). I'm trying not to sleep on my back either since "they" say that lying on your back is bad. It hinders the baby's access to oxygen and I'm not too thrilled about depriving Bucky of that main necessity. So on my side I go, with a pillow between my knobby knees.

"They" also suggest the left side is best... Why? I have yet to get a satisfying answer, but when I do I'll let you know.

It takes me quite awhile to fall asleep and there is a lot of switching from side to side, punctuated with huffs and sighs (all of which I'm sure Ross just loves). Then I wake up to head to the bathroom and have to go through it all again before I'm rudely awakened by our alarm. I doubt, no matter how much energy I gain back in this second trimester, that I'll ever pop out of bed!

Bucky is now the size of a computer mouse or small fist, three to four inches and weighing in at a mighty one ounce or so. Go, go, Bucky!

Kids, they just grow so fast..."
--Clare, 8/1/05