How are you choosing names?

"Ross and I already knew our girl name even before we found out I was pregnant. That one was easy (we even have a back up name, just in case the first doesn't fit). Choosing a boy's name has proven much harder. In general we're looking to family and traditional names, but may have to expand that spectrum if we're to agree on a boy's name.

Picking a name is a lot more emotional and powerful than either of us expected. We have decided to keep all the options under wraps because we have heard many a story of parents-to-be sharing the name of their future child and then getting a rash of responses like, "you can't name her that!" or, "so you do love Uncle Tommy better than me?" or, "ugh, I had a teacher named Jane that I just hated," and so forth. Also uncomfortable for some parents was when friends and family would refer to the baby by his future name before birth. I hear it can feel somewhat ominous when that happens."
--Clare, 10/27/05

Family time

"The hardest thing Ross and I have had to deal with in this pregnancy isn't the unpredictable hormones, or the knowledge that our lives are about to change drastically -- it is the fact that we live so far away from both our families. With two sets of grandparents-to-be halfway across the country and the third all the way across the country, and with all the future aunts and uncles sprinkled throughout, we have not been able to share this pregnancy with them as much as we want to. However, our family members have each had, or will have a chance to see the bulge before the little bundle arrives.

Around 22 weeks my mom and Jim were in town for a conference and were able to visit with us a number of times. It was especially nice timing, because it was around my birthday and we could all celebrate together. Even though it was my birthday, they had gotten 'birthday' gifts for both Ross and Bucky: cute little wash-cloths and baby-sensitive soaps. Their excitement was evident and it was very sweet to know that they were trying not to go overboard on baby items.

What's funny is that when I picked them up from the airport, nothing was really said about my belly. Then when we got together a few days later, my mom said, 'I think you're bigger today.' When the conference was over and I drove Mom and Jim back to the airport, we all hugged good-bye and they made sure to pat Bucky farewell, too. It's very amusing to watch our parents turn into grandparents!

Next it was Ross' parents' turn. They came into town when I was between 25 and 26 weeks. This was their chance to help us get the house ready since they live so far away. Lots of little projects, and bigger ones, were accomplished (I was restricted to the small, light jobs). It was fun to watch Ross and his dad work together. It was so easy to envision Ross helping Bucky twenty-odd years down the road in the same way. Again, it was difficult to send the future grandparents off at the airport. But in having family members visit us, I'm reminded that this little person, not yet here, is already getting so much love from so many relatives. It's a comforting thought.

It's not just grandparents-to-be that have been visiting. Future uncle John spent the weekend with us at the end of week 26. It was a special, spur of the moment treat that he could come down. It was nice to share this experience with my big brother. Having him in town made it really 'hit home' that Ross and I are beginning our own family. Hopefully, our kids will get to have the same type of relationships that we have with each of our siblings.

I suspect that my belly, and the whole experience, kinda blew my brother away. The first time he saw me was in my Halloween outfit, so that was startling in itself, but it didn't really make the pregnant belly stand out. However, the next day I was sitting cross-legged on the couch and John commented that I looked like a little Buddha! It was fun to see his reactions to his little sister being 'with child.'

Our good times sharing the Bucky bulge with family members will continue. My dad and Ann will be here to visit at week 28. We'll see all of Ross' family (including the future uncle Carl and aunt Emily) at Thanksgiving (week 30). We'll also see all of my family (including future aunt Anna) a few weeks later at my cousin's wedding. We shall see where we are for celebrating Christmas, my doctor isn't all that jazzed about our plans to travel that weekend, seeing as it's a little over a month out from the due date, but I'm determined to make it happen. I want to spend time with our families before the baby arrives and they start focusing all their attention on him or her."
--Clare, 11/09/05

Hiccups!

"Around 26-28 weeks a baby usually begins practicing swallowing and breathing movements and can develop the hiccups. Apparently, Bucky has started practicing. The last two days after I've finished lunch and returned to my desk I've felt this light tap-tap-tap happening where Bucky's head is supposedly positioned. It doesn't feel like the regular kicks or wiggling around. It's only in precisely one location and sort of like a metronome rhythm. Occasionally there is a delay in the repetitions, but overall it's very consistent.

Yesterday, it happened twice! The second time when I had just arrived home from work. I made Ross feel for it and he described it as feeling like a little heart beat. I tell you, this is really cool. If we had a stethoscope, I wonder if we could hear any sound from them? Little chirps maybe?

The funny thing is I don't think Bucky really likes having the hiccups, because when the hiccups happen his or her legs and arms start squirming about as though Bucky's saying, "I don't like this, make it stop."

Sorry, Bucky. If you're anything like your mom these hiccups aren't ever going away."
--Clare, 11/03/05

What did I tell you?

"This email just came in from one of my mommy-to-be friends, Sarah. I'm telling you the boy trend is really taking off:

'Now I am 22 weeks along... I can't believe it is going so fast... I am now to the point where people can tell I am pregnant, not just fat! It's fun. Justen [father-to-be] is just in awe about the whole thing. We had the sonogram last week and found out we are having a boy! We are really excited, though neither of us had any preference. It is just fun to know what it is and be able to start buying things!'

To date, the official count now stands at: nine pregnant women, five boys (out of a possible 10 babies -- twins). You'll have to wait for the birth for Lisa and Avi's results, as well as for the unveiling of Bucky. Claire and Matt may or may not find out the gender of their twins, and I've yet to hear from the other set of parents-to-be what they plan on doing -- my guess is that they're waiting."
--Clare, 11/04/05

I won the costume contest

"Halloween is a mixed-bag holiday for me. Sometimes I'm really into it, other times I just want the candy. This is the only time of the year I let myself eat those mini-Milky Way bars, and I just devour them. Maybe that's why Bucky has been so active lately?

This year I wasn't sure how the trick-or-treating would go in our new neighborhood, so I didn't get very excited about Monday night. However, I was excited about the Saturday night before Halloween because our friend Kate was having a costume party and my brother was coming into town for a visit.

I have often used my unique physical features to enhance a Halloween costume. Before I had my tooth-implant surgery I had a false tooth on a retainer. This could easily be removed to create "authentic" improvements to my costumes. My favorite was dressing up as Rocky Balboa!

This year I wanted to come up with something unique for my pregnancy. None of that "paint the belly orange to be a pumpkin" or, ha-ha-ha "dress up like a nun". No. I wanted something original, something different, something comfortable...




Hello, my name is Rodger the Pepsi truck driver."
--Clare, 11/04/05

The beginning of the end

"Today, November 1, is a momentous day. Not only is it the beginning of my seventh month of pregnancy, it's the last week of my second trimester, and the 90-day mark. Plus, it's time for a picture:





I didn't actually realize I was this big. I mean I feel big. I feel like I Look like one of The Monkeys during their opening credits as they do their swing-leg walk. My walk is no longer feminine -- I waddle. I just didn't know I looked so big, too!

With my growing belly comes aches and heightened sense of irritability... though that might mostly be a result of our dishwasher recently breaking. It wouldn't be such a big deal if it were an old funky green one. However, it's new, the old owner renovated right before she sold to us, and we haven't even used it for seven months! Now that we're spending so much time hand-washing dishes and trying to figure out how to fix the dang machine, I have become the old cliché: barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen!"
--Clare, 11/1/05